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never say nag

Gemma Hartley

Your male partner thinks he's a legend for cooking dinner. But who knows when the kids' sports days are, or the dog's immunisations are due; when the babysitter is coming, or who the babysitter even is? Women have shouldered domestic responsibility for too long and we're fed up.

Hosted by Jamila Rizvi.

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“I don't want to micromanage housework. I want a partner with equal initiative.”

Gemma Hartley

Emotional labour in the everyday

In 2017, journalist Gemma Hartley's Harper's Bazaar article "Women Aren't Nags - We're Just Fed Up" was viewed over two billion times. The mental load, she wrote, of managing a household - recording schedules, organising cleaning duties, remembering birthday cards - invariably falls, in heterosexual couples, to women. 

Bringing long overdue awareness to the daunting reality of emotional labour in our lives, Hartley defines the largely invisible but demanding, time-consuming, and exhausting "worry work" that falls disproportionately and unfairly on all women - no matter what economic class or level of education. This household admin of mothers and wives is based on the assumption that women are better at feeling and expressing emotions.

So how can we move past the gender imbalance and into truly equal domestic partnerships? 

More about ...

Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley is a writer, reporter, and author who specializes in feminism, pop-culture, health & wellness, finance, budgeting, and mindfulness. Her work has been featured in outlets like Harper’s Bazaar, Women’s Health, Glamour, The Washington Post, CNBC, Cosmopolitan, Good Housekeeping, Teen Vogue, and The Huffington Post. She lives with her husband, three young children, a wonderful dog and a terrible cat in Reno, Nevada. Fed Up: Emotional Labour, Women, and the Way Forward was published in 2018.

Jamila Rizvi

Jamila Rizvi is an author, presenter and political commentator. She is Editor-at-Large for the Nine Network's Future Women platform and hosts their podcast of the same name. Jamila is a regular commentator on The Project, Today, 3AW, The Drum and ABC News Breakfast and an occasional host on ABC Melbourne Afternoons. She has authored two best-selling books Not Just Lucky (2017) – a career manifesto for millennial women – and The Motherhood (2018)  – a collection of letters from some of Australia’s favorite women, sharing what they wish they’d known about life with a newborn.

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